Momma has lost her mind.

Stripping Off The Bubble Wrap In 2014.

I’m not really sure what rattled me this year, but something convinced me to head right out of my comfort zone. This past year, I was encouraged to run towards resistance. I wanted to be challenged. I wanted to succeed and fail just the same. I craved learning from both experiences. In taking chances, both big and small, I’ve learned what I’m capable of, conquered fears, shared lots of laughs and created an itch to keep thinking big!

Here are a few of the challenges, risks and small steps I took in 2014:

Defeated my fear of heights.

Not me, but you get the idea. Crazy, scary stuff!
Not me, but you get the idea. Crazy, scary stuff!

I willingly put myself in an enclosed tube and fell straight down a waterslide. This may seem like no big deal to some but I never imagined myself doing this. As I stood in the tiny tube of hell and waited for the floor to fall out from under me, I seriously considered myself insane. What in God’s name would convince me to do this. 5…4…3…2…1 HOLLLLLLY SHIIIIIIIIT !!!!!!!!!!!! And down I went. I screamed, maybe cried a little but was definitely laughing by the time I got to the bottom. As soon as I pulled my bathing suit out of my intestines, I ran right back up and did it all over again. I will say, peer pressure worked to my advantage for once. I never would have done this if a good friend of mine wouldn’t have talked me in to it.

A challenge for my physical and mental body.

The adventure course’s website came through my Facebook newsfeed early last summer. From the first time I saw it, I wanted to do this with my husband, which shocked even me. As the hubs and I pulled in to the park, we saw people swinging through trees, zip lining and walking on small, swinging logs, so far up I could barely see from the car. I can’t lie. I was seriously shaking. But I did it! This was physical at times but more mental. I had to push fear aside and just take that first step. I had to just believe that I would be ok, as I hooked my self to the 60 ft high zip line, lifted my feet and just flew through the trees. It was liberating and fun!

Followed my heart  2,682,420 miles (no exaggeration at all) across the east coast.

Ok, so many that is a little bit of an exaggeration. But when you have two small kids in a car, driving from NY to FL, it feels like an eternity. It was worth it though. I saw family that I hadn’t seen in 16 years. I have more relatives in heaven than I do on the ground so this needed to happen. My aunt and my cousins hold a special place in my heart because of the stories that bind us. I felt so blessed to be able to visit with my cousin, Serina–a true kindred soul. Remember, I told you how two dead people conspired to bring us together? Watching our kids play together and just being near blood relatives, that looked like me, was something I’ll cherish for the rest of my life.

Slept under the stars.

I may have been in a tent and on an air mattress but it still counts. I left my husband and kids at home (something I had never done) and headed to the woods. “You’re going camping?” That was the response I got when I told people I was going to spend the weekend in the woods. “I don’t think you know what you’re in for” said my lovely hubs. I was kind of appalled by that. And boy did it make me want to go even more. I’m not a princess, nor am I afraid of getting back to basics. So why did they doubt me? Turns out, it was one of the best weekends I’ve ever had. A group of my favorite ladies and I ate like queens, drank like the party girls we all used to be and I found peace by the river. It was epic and we have already planned out a trip for next summer.

Took my writing to the next level.

trigger point cover

My writing has taken me places I never saw coming this year. It has allowed me to not only work through my own recovery, but become an advocate for other survivors. How crazy that I teamed up with a complete stranger to create a book about something that before last year, I could barely talk about. That is the power of connection. I put the fear of rejection to the side this year and it paid off big. I have been featured on several other sites, including Scary Mommy and Huffington Post–both bucket list items for me. I started writing fiction and found that I absolutely love it! Read a saucy little piece I wrote here. I truly learned the power of words this year. To Learn more about the anthology, you can view our website here.

From the W.T.F. homestead, to all of my friends, family and lovely followers…In the coming year, I wish you love, laughter and the courage to get back up when you fall down. Let us all breathe in the good stuff and learn from the curve balls life will throw at us.

Happy New Years!! ~Dawn 

What’s something you did this year that surprised you? What did you learn from it?

Don't take life too serious.

2013 Unplugged.

Music is an attatchment of my personality.  I compartmentalize memories by the songs that fit or joined the moments.  My strongest sense is sound because it evokes the most emotion for me.  I can’t think of a better way to sum up the sounds of this past year than with a soundtrack dedicated to 2013.

Figuratively speaking, I’ve been stripped down, exposed, enlightened and grounded through out this year.  I decided to play on that theme with my picks and plug in the unplugged versions.  Acoustic is always better in my opinion anyway.  I couldn’t find acoustic versions by the original artist everytime so I used a cover version worthy enough.

p.s. I live under a rock that is owned by a one yr old and a four yr old so my selections are by no means “new” hits.  I’m still jamming to Third Eye (the original album) mmm…k.

I’ve linked to a few of my favorite posts since I began blogging in October.  Check them out!  I’ve really just begun.

I don’t think anything describes my evolution of spirit this past year quite like The Cave.  I mean that literally! I have been a SAHM in my home, a 100 yr old fixer upper cave, for the past year.  I’m lucky I haven’t gone bat shit crazy.  Thank God for Mumford and Sons ability to make me dance like a fool, ponder and enjoy the moments.

This song will forever remind me of kitchen utensil microphones and superstar Mom and daughter moments through out this year.  We got our rock star on many, many times to this one.  It became quite an anthem for me.

Had my husband and I not run away to Jamaica to get married, this would have been our wedding song.  I feel like we have strengthened each other this year and it fits us now more than ever.  He’s been a rock both to hold on to and to hold me up.  The love I have for him is ever growing.

I have come to enjoy the pink and purple and rough and tough rock I live under.  It’s a more pleasant place than one would think.  My day to day life keeps me away from the televised news.  I’ve managed to stay somewhat enough afloat to know this song still fits.  I credit Jon Stewart completely.

Going from a two income household and one child to two children and one income is …well…tough.  I seriously deserve a ghetto fabulous award for stretching a dollar as far as I have this past year.  It’s become a laughing matter because if we didn’t laugh, we would had to add divorce to the list of expenses.  And so I give you the funny guys of Barenaked Ladies.

One more that triggers memories of my daughter’s first attempts at learning “Mommy’s” songs.  This was a new one for me too via Pandora.  Wagon Wheel (not the Darius Rucker version…even my four yr old is pissed about that cover) has become our (dysfunctional) family sing along on road trips.

My thirty something years on this planet have finally started to come together.  Only a classic is encompassing enough to cover this topic for me.  Thank-You-Stevie.

This past year, I’ve come up against (again) and finally feel like I have made it to the other side of struggles I’ve had with depression, surviving child hood abuse and losing my Mom at a young age.  The difference now is the peace I have made with all of it.  As crazy as it sounds, I owe A LOT of that to this song (and anti-depressants, good friends and family, blogging, and sheer grace).  It has meant so many different things to me at so many different points in my life.

And to end it off…I have to say I have come to know this point in my life as precious.  My kids are very young, full of spirit and unconditional, pure love and innocence.  It’s tough being in the trenches day after day but I know how very worth it is.  I just hope I hang on to these memories as tight as I’m trying to moment to moment.  For this time stamp I have to use two songs.  One to capture the madness of being a SAHM and one to capture the essence of it.

Cheers to 2014!